Review: Chocolate Buddy Smooth Peanut Butter Cups

I picked these up from Sainsbury’s.  L and I were wandering the aisles looking for novelty in consumer form, one of my favourite activities and something I find genuinely gratifying, if a little hollowed out.  There is probably something wrong with me deep down, something unfulfilled (I always wanted to live by the sea; I also feel perhaps I could have been a sailor?).  In any case these sugary snacks were chosen to fill the gaping wound that is modern urban life.


They are not good.  Neither one thing or the other, it isn’t praline enough to be a smooth praline and the hazelnut overtones interfere with the artificial earthy peanut taste so beloved of fans of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup.  These pay homage to those vaulted kings of the luxury chocolate snack aisle, but in the same way that a long poo is an homage to a lovely meal.  They don’t even have that little black bit of paper lining to make them seem posher than the Yorkie that you put down right before you picked this up.

Avoid these if you can.




Posh Chicken Dippers

One thing I haven’t really posted about on here is food.  My monologues, poetry and general observations seemed to me to be the interesting things.  Eating (we eat most days and cook most days) seemed to be secondary.  I work for a large publisher and we have a cookery/food list.  They are nice and they win awards and stuff.  Over the last few weeks and months, I have seen more cook books than I usually would do.  I began to think: maybe I could work on my own, very limited, collection of recipes?

I have had for a long time the ‘Vegetarian Cookbook’ and in a burst of optimism about the grocery situation in East Ham, I bought the Leon cookbook (the first one with the lists of cheeses and fruits).  You can get almost nothing they mention in my local Tesco Express.  So, I have muddled on, slowly developing a repertoire of base ingredients, spice mixes and ways to cook them.  I thought I would share my lunch recipe here in case you lack inspiration to make your own.

‘Posh Chicken Dippers’

Serves 1


Seven/eight Birds Eye Crispy Chicken Dippers (don’t use the own brand ones!)
1x brown onion, medium sized
2x charlotte potatoes
Mustard seeds, half a teaspoon
1 tsp of salt
Crushed chilli seeds
Garlic, 1 clove
Ginger powder (use fresh ginger if you can be bothered, makes a lot of difference)
1x lime
50g sweetcorn, frozen

Okay, so it’s pretty simple.  You first need to add the Chicken Dippers to the oven, gas mark 7, and cook for 20 minutes.  The first ten minutes, you can relax, read a book, listen to some music.  I would recommend maybe the new album by Metz, although it is pretty hectic.  Maybe try the Beach House album if you are a moody sort, or there’s the Twin Shadow album ‘Confess’ which works well for hipsters.

Finely chop garlic, after peeling.  Add to bowl.  Add your 1 tsp of ginger powder.  Add the salt.  How much salt?  Up to you buddy.  You like salt?  Go for it.  Just don’t come to me when you’re adding cruet sets full to your fish and chips.  Add the crushed chilli seeds, vary amount according to taste.  Add mustard seeds. This is your base. [not a cooking term]

Peel the Charlotte potatoes and dice into pieces thinner than a julienne, maybe 2/3mm cubed.  Keep bigger if you like crunchy uncooked potatoes or are a bit of a cack hand with the knife.  Halve the onion, peel, and then slice 3mm thicknesses for each half.  This will fall apart nicely in the pan.

Add a little bit of oil to the wok or pan.  Put up on high heat, the hotter the better.  This should be done around five minutes before the Dippers are cooked.  Put your base into the pan, it will sizzle.  Absorb aroma – good, eh?  It’s nice.  You’re doing well.  So, turn the extractor fan on, and then add the potatoes and the onions.  Do this before the mustard seeds pop – if they pop before you will end up with hot oil-coated missiles flying everywhere – this is not good.

Keep stirring.  When you achieve a little bit of browning on the onions, add the sweetcorn.  At this point you can add a bit of Lea and Perrins if you want, but it’s up to you.  Keep stirring, high heat.  Cut the lime in half and add the juice of half a lime to the dish.  You can use the other half for a garnish/dressing or in a gin collins or G and T. I would use it to make a drink if I am honest, otherwise you are just wasting a good lime.

Get the chicken dippers out, and they should be crispy and golden.  Add whole to the pan, stir until they are coated with the stuff in the pan.  The lime juice should be making the sides of the pan go a bit grey as it boils off.  This is your cue to serve up, and go and eat.  You can add chilli sauce if you find it bland but depending on the quality of the ingredients you used, it should taste just fine.  Next time why not add a few beansprouts and maybe some peas to differentiate and add some roughage?  You can use torn chicken breast if you are a bit posh.